Mother's Day

This is a bittersweet subject for me.  For most of you who don’t know me I am an only child.  My parents divorced when I was three years old.  It had always been the two of us.  We were more like sisters than mother and daughter.  In August 2008 she left this world and went to her Heavenly home.  When she passed I felt as though half of me went with her.  She was my mother, my father, my sister, and my best friend all rolled into one person.  She had already helped me through what I thought was one of the hardest things to go through, a miscarriage that April.  Losing her broke me.  While grieving I was pregnant with my third baby.  That November I lost my sweet baby Logan at 20 weeks.  This was another crushing loss in an already dark time.  God pulled me through as only he can and I am a stronger Christian for it.  On Mother’s Day I miss being able to celebrate the woman who loved me and made me who I am today.  I think about my two perfect babies in Heaven who are waiting for me with my mom.  These thoughts are only half of my feelings of the day.  I also thank the Lord for allowing me to have such a wonderful mother.  I am blessed beyond measure to be the mother of two wonderful children, Colin and Lily.  They have the biggest hearts of any two children I have ever known.  Colin fills my life with so much joy and excitement.  There is never a dull moment with him and I love that.  Lily is my sunshine.  She lights up our house with so much love.  I will never understand why things happen the way they do.  It’s hard to not question God.  I have learned that his plan is the ultimate one and through those dark days there is light at the end of it.  God will be there with you, carrying you through the hard times and rejoicing with you through the good.  So for Mother’s Day, miss your mom and babies if they are gone, but love on the family you have.  They are a true blessing.

I have always loved this picture.  I was only a day old.

This is one of my favorite pictures of my mom and me.

One of the happiest days of my life, holding Colin for the first time.

I love him with all my heart.

My perfect little princess.

My sunshine!

I made this a few years ago.  I got the idea from a blog I was reading and thought I would try it.  These are the actual size of my babies hands.  Logan's is the smallest with a cross in the middle for my second baby.  There is not a day that goes by that I don't think of them.  I just hug Colin and Lily a little tighter for being my little blessings from God.